When Women & Money was first published it was my eighth book. All my previous books were written with the belief that gender is not a factor in mastering smart financial management. Women can invest, save, and handle debt just as well and skillfully as any man.

So imagine my surprise when I learned that some of the people closest to me were in the dark about their own finances. Smart, competent, accomplished women who present a face to the world that is pure confidence and capability — yet hiding their financial troubles, even from themselves.

It began with a high-powered businesswoman who handled millions a year but refused to sign will and trust documents for three years. Then another friend confessed she had rung up staggering bills and was too terrified to tell anyone. Another had finally woken up to the fact that her employer was paying her significantly less than every comparable executive in her company — yet she just accepted the minimal annual increase.

Upon further investigation, I learned that so many women shared this stumbling block: an “unknown factor” that prevented them from doing the right thing with their money. Fear of the unknown; a streak of rebellion; or embarrassment too great to ask for help.

This stumbling block is exhibited not only by women in their 40s, 50s, and 60s but by women of all ages. When I am with women in their 20s and 30s, I love that you aren’t asking for equality — you expect it. You know you’ve got what it takes. Yet like your mothers, aunts, and grandmothers, you share with me how confused and powerless you are with your money. You refuse to get involved until some crisis occurs.

Women of all ages have the horrible habit of thinking money is just too complicated to master. You give up without even trying. It is not a question of intelligence. You absolutely have what it takes.

We have a right to be proud. I only wish it told the whole truth.

For all the advancements women have made — remarkable accomplishments — I am stunned by how little has changed in the way so many women deal with money. There are huge disconnects between what we know and how we act; between our ability as achievers and our financial underachieving; between the power we have within reach and the powerlessness that rules our actions.